Monday 5 April 2010

New Life

I've been lucky enough to have a new god-daughter enter my life recently, and she's got me thinking about what babies represent . . .

For me, I hold her in my arms, & I feel the privilege of holding a brand new life. I wonder what the future holds for her, & I just hope that it brings her lots of love, happiness, good health, fun and joy. And I'm sure it will . . . but I'm just as sure that it will also bring her lots of pain, upset, disappointment, tears and frustrations, because that's what life's about. The good alongside the not so good. I'd like to protect her from all of those more negative experiences, but I can't. She's going to have to experience them all for herself. And actually, I wouldn't want to protect her too much, because isn't it sometimes the more painful or 'negative' experiences in life which teach us the most important lessons? I've certainly learnt more about myself through some of the more painful experiences in my life.

The innocence and purity of a brand new life . . . it's incredible to watch the pureness of the emotions that pass across her face, and to watch just how in touch with her emotional and bodily needs she is. But how long will it be, before, like most of us, she learns to hide those raw emotions, she learns to monitor and limit her bodily needs, and she begins to lose touch with the purity that is her true self?

As a counsellor, I spend many hours with clients working with them as they try to get back in touch with the essence of who they were, and could still be. As a result of things said to them, or not said to them, by parents and other caregivers across the years, people can so easily lose touch with who they really are . . . and that can be when psychological problems can sneak in.
But that's scary for someone entrusted to take care of a brand new life . . . how on earth can I (and everyone else in her life) ensure that I get it right for her, that I give her the best chance in life and don't burden her with unrealistic expectations and limitations?

As babies, we enter this world innocent and full of potential . . . but how many of us get the opportunity to actually fulfill that potential? How many of us get sidetracked - quite often by the best of intentions by caregivers? Looking after a baby, a brand new human being, is such a scary prospect, but it's also such a huge, huge privilege, and one that brings with it so many rewards; the first time a baby responds to you with genuine smile is an experience that should be recognised for the privilege it is.